When I got home I thought I might never again love Paris the way I did before I went. It was idealized, it was the city of light, the city of love, etc. How could I love it the same way after seeing it's imperfections and smelling it's *delightful smells? But I now months later I have the same longing for Paris as I did for home while I was in Paris. I feel like I'm a fish out of water in both places- but at least here I can fully communicate with most anyone. It happened slowly...
Somewhere between my walk back from my french class to my apartment I realized that I couldn't take a detour down the champs-elysee. On friday night I couldn't pop over to the Louvre for student night. There was no lili's just around the corner to grab hot chocolate and a muffin at and there definitely was not a bakery full of amazing baguettes right next to my apartment nor a metro to take me anywhere I wanted to go.
Once I got home things went back to their normal rhythm and it felt like nothing happened. That pause button that I felt was pressed all last year really did work for the most part- save for the random questions about me and Paris.
In July I thought I'd wouldn't want to go back to Paris for a VERY long time, essentially I was all Parisianed out. However, when I first arrived at my welcome home party 20 minutes early and I realized it was because I automatically add twenty to thirty minutes onto any travel time to account for metro madness. A fact that became dreadfully apparent when I showed up to my first class 30 minutes early. (In Paris it would take anywhere from 20 minutes to 40 minutes to get to class depending on time of day and who was driving the metro.)
The second time I realized times had changed was the fact that I show up to class looking respectable. I wore my silver shoes and a nice top with jeans- while the person sitting next to me was decked out in gym shorts and the shirt they slept in. I transfered to flip flops pretty quickly but that still felt strange. I was pretty much overdressed anywhere I went. One day I woke up late and I was just going to wear a t-shirt. I made it all the way to the door before running back into my room and putting on a different shirt. It took a weekend of FREEZING cold weather and me having no other choice for me to wear my hoodie to a football game AND TENNIS SHOES GASP!! (Now I wear it out a little more frequently.)
When I saw my full size fridge I did a dance! Now I wouldn't HAVE to go to the grocery store EVERYDAY. However, I miss the fresh ingredients the ability to just run around the corner to grab anything that I need. Now I have to jump in my car (if it's even in the parking lot- usually not) and run and get the thing I need. I have to plan menus out in advance which doesn't sit well after a year of playing it off the cuff.
Studying abroad provides the amazing opportunity to meet a bunch of different people from all around the world. I met some of the most amazing and interesting people while in Paris. They challenged me to see the world in a different way and introduced me to new foods, new music, and just a new outlook on life. But spontaneity was always there- did you want to go on a trip this weekend? do you want to go grab a coffee after class? wanna go have lunch next to the eiffel tower? People are so set in their regular routines at home that it can be hard to just go and live life. I mean in college people are a lot more flexible than in the "real world" but even still we have so many obligations and participate in so many different activities we have stopped being able to enjoy we are doing and just be spontaneous. Being able to break out of that routine is something I need to do more often now.
I am now able to easily-ish polish off a 15 minute presentation no sweat... well except for the fact that for the rest of my life I will be haunted by Ambassador Bolewski about my presentation style; however, that's why I didn't choose to go to school in Germany and he needs to pick up on that. That man is never happy and 8 am doesn't make it better.
I will always crave the 2x2x2 at BIA and nothing I can find here really compares to it. MMMmmm Raspberry Dark chocolate chunk pancakes and skillet potatoes! Pretty much worth a flight to Paris in order to get Breakfast in America haha. I'm "only" six away from a free meal!
I learned that nothing can be quite as dehumanizing as the medical test for your titre de séjour in Paris. Nor can anything be quite as surprising as the little gift they give you for showing up. It can also be said that nothing is as arduous as waiting for that blasted titre de séjour!
(Sidenote: I have framed my x-ray and it is hanging on my wall for everyone I told I would. My carte de séjour is with it proudly. It reminds me that I can make it through most anything- or any wait.) I've decided that the french medical people are run by the secretary at the BNP- the one who refused to give me my bank card. I had nightmares about her. I even brought in Anne-Laure to translate just incase there was something I was missing- there wasn't. Me not receiving my card for several months is just how things worked out for me.
New Joke: How many people does it take to change a lightbulb in my old apartment? It could take a million and those ridiculous things would still never work! It was pretty much a death sentence when a light went out- which usually involved at least one electrocution and 4 months of no light in the bathroom/living in a dark cavernous room.)
The whole depression in winter thing- completely TRUE. When the sun comes up at 9:30 and goes back down at 16:00 sadness ensues. Conversely, when the sun comes up at 4:30 and goes down at 23:00 happiness abounds.
Don't get me wrong... on a beautiful 73 degree day in December I am quite happy to be in Atlanta. At the same time, I find myself walking along and reminiscing about that one time where I was in a french zombie mob, or getting fighting off pickpockets in Portugal, eating the best gelato ever in Venice, canyoning in switzerland, tasting chocolate in Turin, driking wine out of a baby bottle in Paris, and I smile to myself and sigh. C'est drôle la vie. The grass is always greener on the other side.
Would I do it again knowing everything I now know- In a heartbeat. I also recommend anyone and everyone to study abroad or just push the horizons of their world beyond their comfort zone and discover a new perhaps better way of life- or maybe just a new appreciation of your own.



